Derick’s challenge to coffee drinkers
Coffee facts to make you dangerously interesting
Coffee is a fruit, espresso is not a bean, and decaf is not entirely caffeine-free.
There. We have already upset at least three people, and breakfast has barely started.
Coffee is one of those things we interact with every day without giving it much thought. We scoop it, brew it and rely on it to make us socially acceptable. Meanwhile, the humble cup in front of us is quietly carrying centuries of history, agricultural science and enough chemistry to keep a laboratory busy.
So, before someone asks you to pass the sugar, here are a few facts worth knowing.
Coffee beans are not really beans
Coffee grows on trees or shrubs as a fruit commonly called a coffee cherry.
Inside each cherry are usually two seeds, positioned with their flatter sides facing one another. Those seeds are what we call coffee beans.
Occasionally, a cherry develops only one rounded seed. This is known as a peaberry. Some people believe peaberries taste sweeter or more concentrated, but their quality still depends on the variety, growing conditions, processing and roasting.
Calling them beans is much easier than saying, “Would you like a cup of roasted fruit seeds?” That sounds more like something prepared during a survival challenge.
Coffee flowers before it produces cherries
Before there is a coffee cherry, there is a flower.
Coffee flowers are small, white and often compared to jasmine because of their sweet fragrance. Once pollination takes place, the flowers give way to green cherries that gradually ripen, often turning red or yellow depending on the variety.
Not all cherries necessarily ripen at the same time. This is why selective hand-picking can matter. Workers may return to the same tree several times, choosing only the ripe fruit.
Your morning cup begins with considerably more patience than you give it credit for.
Espresso is a brewing method
There is no espresso plant quietly growing in a secret Italian field.
Espresso is coffee prepared using a particular brewing method. Hot water is forced through finely ground coffee under pressure, producing a small, concentrated drink.
Different coffee beans and roast levels can be used for espresso. Labels such as “espresso roast” usually mean the roaster believes that coffee will perform well with the espresso method. It does not mean the beans belong to a separate espresso species.
Also, it is pronounced espresso, without an “x”.
We will not judge anyone who says expresso before 07:00. After 07:00, we may need to talk.
An espresso does not always contain more caffeine than brewed coffee
Espresso contains more caffeine per millilitre because it is concentrated. However, it is served in a much smaller quantity than a mug of brewed coffee.
One espresso shot may therefore contain less total caffeine than a large cup of filter coffee.
The caffeine in your drink depends on several factors, including the type of coffee, the quantity used, brewing method, extraction and serving size.
This is an important distinction if you have ever ordered a very large coffee and called it “just one cup”.
Technically correct. Spiritually questionable.
Decaf still contains a little caffeine
Decaffeination removes most of the caffeine from green coffee beans before they are roasted. It does not generally remove every last trace.
The process typically removes about 97 per cent of the original caffeine. A cup of decaf may still contain a small amount, although considerably less than regular coffee.
Decaf is therefore better understood as dramatically reduced caffeine rather than absolutely zero caffeine.
And no, drinking decaf is not an admission of defeat. Sometimes people enjoy the flavour of coffee but would also like to sleep again one day.
Darker coffee is not automatically more caffeinated
Dark roast tastes stronger because the roasting process creates deeper, more bitter and smoky flavours. That bold taste can make it seem as though the coffee contains more caffeine.
Roast darkness alone is not a reliable guide to the amount of caffeine in your cup. The dose and brewing method have a greater effect.
Choosing the darkest roast because you need more energy is a little like choosing the loudest car because you assume it must be the fastest.
Noise and performance are not the same thing.
Grind size can rescue or ruin your cup
Water needs time to extract flavour from ground coffee. The finer the grind, the more surface area the water can reach and the faster extraction happens.
Espresso uses a fine grind because the water passes through quickly. A French press uses a coarse grind because the coffee remains in contact with the water for several minutes.
If the grind is too fine for the method, the coffee may over-extract and taste bitter or harsh. If it is too coarse, the coffee may under-extract and taste weak, sour or watery.
Before blaming the coffee beans, the machine, the weather or the person who bought them, check the grind.
Coffee does not improve with age
Coffee is not wine, cheese or a family story that becomes more dramatic every Christmas.
Once roasted, coffee gradually loses aroma and flavour as it is exposed to oxygen, moisture, heat and light. Grinding speeds this up because it creates more surface area.
Store coffee in an airtight, opaque container in a cool, dry place. Buy quantities you can use while they are still fresh, and grind just before brewing where possible.
The decorative glass jar next to the sunny kitchen window may look magnificent, but your coffee is in there ageing under full public observation.
Now use your knowledge responsibly
These facts are meant to make coffee more interesting, not turn breakfast into a compulsory seminar.
Share one or two. Read the room. Let people finish their first cup.
The more you learn about coffee, the more extraordinary it becomes. It begins as a flower, turns into a fruit, travels across the world, survives processing and roasting, and finally lands in your cup.
Then we drink it while answering emails and wondering where the morning went.
Coffee deserves better.
At the very least, it deserves an airtight container.